Forever: Chapter 9

After he landed in London, Timothy took a taxi from the airport to Stella and Edward's house. When Stella opened the door and saw him standing in front of her with a suitcase in his hand, she got shocked. There was no need for Timothy to explain to her why he was there. She already knew, but she couldn't tell him that Valerie was in her home at that same moment. Valerie wouldn't like that. From his face, she could see how desperate he was to find her. He looked so tired and exhausted. Who knows when the last time he slept.

"Stella, hi! Please, if you know, tell me where Valerie is. I'm trying to find her because I need to talk to her. Please help me! I'm begging you!" Timothy said.

"Hello, Tim! I didn't expect you! Yes, I know what happened between you two, and I'm truly sorry. Will you please wait here for a moment?" Stella said, and she left him outside to wait.

She couldn't let him in because Valerie's parents and Tessa were in the living room. If they saw each other, it would have become a very awkward situation for everyone. Stella went upstairs to Valerie's room. She knocked on the door, and she let herself in without waiting for Valerie's approval.

"Timothy is here!" Stella said while she was trying to catch her breath.

"What? Where?" Valerie asked, confused.

"I left him to wait at the front door because I didn't know what to do. I couldn't let him in, because your family is in the living room. He wants to see you, and I don't believe that he will leave until you talk to him..."

"Did you tell him that I'm here?"

"No, I haven't! He doesn't know where you are."

"Oh, thank God! But why did he come to look for me here?"

"I don't know. I guess he knows you well. You were together your whole life, and there are few places in London where you can be."

And Valerie knew him well, too. She knew that he'd come to London, and he wouldn't give up on her easily. If she were at his place, she would do the same. She would fight for him until her heart stopped beating, and she would go to the end of the world to find him.

This time, she must be more convincing than the previous time on the beach. This time, she must make him go away and never come back again. If he comes back after she'll start with the treatment, he'll see that she is ill, he'll find out the whole truth, and nothing will make him go away. He'll stay with her until the end, he'll watch her die, and he'll stay damaged for life.

Valerie got up from the bed, went to the window, and began to think. She had a brilliant idea. Or that was what she thought.

"Aunt Stella! Please tell him that I'll meet him today. I'll call him later to let him know about the time and location."

"All right!"

"And, aunt Stella..."

"Yes?"

"Thank you for everything you're doing for me. I appreciate it. And I'm sorry, I shouldn't have put you in all of this."

"You don't need to thank me for anything. There is nothing I wouldn't do for you. But are you sure of what you're doing? The poor boy came from California to talk to you and to get you back. Maybe you should tell him the truth and let him stay with you."

Valerie just looked at her aunt and said nothing. She was mad because everyone were interfering in her life. It wasn't their business. Before Stella left the room, Valerie took her phone and she dialled her cousin Justin's number.

"Hello?" Justin said on the other end of the line.

"Justin, I need your help!" Valerie said, without first saying "Hello", or wishing him a good day.

"Val, what happened? Are you all right?" Justin asked, petrified.

"Yes, well no. Timothy is here."

"Is that your problem?"

"Yes, at the moment."

"Good. I thought that something horrible had happened," Justin said with relief.

"I have a perfect plan on how to make him go home and never come back, but I'll need your help."

"Are you sure that you want him to go home?"

"Justin..." Valerie said, angrily.

"All right, I'm just asking. I apologize. I shouldn't ask you."

"Listen, I'll meet Timmy later... And do you have a friend who is willing to pretend that he is my boyfriend only for tonight?"

"Let me see... Yes, I think I have a friend... He is an actor, a very good-looking bloke, but I need to call him first to see if he is available for tonight. I'll call you five minutes later. All right?"

Ten minutes later, Justin called Valerie to confirm that his friend was free tonight and that he will help her. Immediately, Valerie called Timothy, and she told him shortly that she would meet him at eight in the small restaurant close to The Old Vic Theatre, which they discovered last summer. He wanted to talk to her over the phone, but Valerie hung out before he had a chance to ask something. When she heard his voice, she got weak in the knees and she began to tremble. Valerie doubted, will she have enough strenght to see him tonight and continue with the lies? Her call gave Timothy a small hope that not everything was lost.

Timothy arrived at the restaurant before seven. He had nowhere to go. The whole day, he was wandering on the streets of London with his small suitcase in hand. He didn't have a hotel reservation, and he didn't know where he would spend the night, but that was unimportant to him at that moment.

He sat at a table by the window, and he watched the people who were passing by on the street. Twenty minutes after eight o'clock, a black Rover stopped in front of the restaurant, and Valerie got out of the car. For a few moments, Valerie waited for the stranger who drove her there to join her, and she took him by hand. While they were coming into the restaurant, he must have said something hilarious, because she laughed. That image broke Timothy's heart into a thousand pieces.

"Hello, Timothy. This is Henry, my boyfriend," Valerie said when she came to Timothy's table with the young, handsome man.

"Hello, mate!" Henry said.

Timothy said nothing. On the plane on the way to London, he prepared a speech, and he knew exactly what he would say to Valerie when he'll see her, but he wasn't expecting that she would be with somebody else. So, this guy, Valerie's new love, really exists. He already took his place, and he was standing in front of him. By the suit he was wearing and by the car he was driving, he really seemed rich.

"Dear, will you please wait for me in the car? I won't be too long," Valerie said to Henry.

"Yes, darling!" Henry looked at Timothy, and he left them alone.

Valerie sat down at Timothy's table, opposite him, as they were always sitting, but this time they were sitting in silence, as they had nothing to say, and they couldn't look at each other. He couldn't accept the fact that she wasn't his anymore, and she couldn't watch him suffer. She hated herself for the pain she was causing him.

"Why did you come to London?" she spoke first.

"I..." he tried to say something, but as his words were stuck in his throat.

"I've told you, it's over between us, and now you have proof. Henry and I, we live together..."

"How could you move on so fast from one man to another, as if I had never meant anything to you? How could you throw away everything we had, just like that?"

"I loved you. You know that I really did, but please try to understand that now I love him..."

"No, I can't understand. In the morning, you loved me, but on the same day, in the evening, you've decided to love him..."

"Love is inexplicable. My love for Henry is different from the love I had for you..."

"No, no, no..."

"Timothy, please go home and try to forget me. I know it won't be easy because I'll never forget you. But there is nothing you can do to make me change my mind. I'm staying here in London, with him, for the rest of my life. Please, don't make this more difficult for both of us than it really is. Please go home and never come back for me again. Please, I'm begging you! Try to understand, it's over."

With the top of her fingers, Valerie touched his hand, and she felt complete for a moment. But, only for a moment. She got up fast, and she left Timothy to sit alone in the restaurant. He turned his head away because he couldn't watch her leave. If only he looked at her at that moment, he would see the truth in her eyes. He would see that she loves him, only him, and there is nobody else but him in her life. But he didn't.

"Can I get you anything else?" the young waitress asked Timothy after Valerie left.

"No thanks, I'm good!"

"Will the young lady who was with you come back?"

"No, she's gone, and I don't think that she'll ever come back," Timothy answered her question with bitterness in his voice.

Straight from the restaurant, Timothy went to the airport, and on the first flight, he returned home in Santa Monica. He had no longer a reason to stay in London. Valerie was a battle he lost, and he should learn to continue to live without her. But how?

In the following days, Valerie couldn't hide her pain from the others. Everyone was giving their best to cheer her up, but nothing helped. Rebecca invited her and Tessa to a fashion show, and Justin wanted to take them to watch a theatre play. She refused them both, with an excuse that she is too tired from the trip, and she needs to rest well before she goes to a doctor on Monday. Valerie spent the entire weekend in her new room. She was crying all the time, while she was thinking about Timothy and the happy times they had together.

Now everything seemed so distant to her. Not because of the actual distance between them, but as she was happy with him in a different life, in a different time, centuries ago. This, what she was living now, was a new life, and she didn't know how to live it without Timothy. He was her whole life. And when she was sleeping, she couldn't find rest. She was only dreaming of him. In her dreams, they were always together, in their special place on the beach, at home. When someone was coming to her room, to bring her food, or to check does she need anything, she pretended that she was sleeping, and she was leaving the food untouched.

Timothy's pictures, he was wondering where they are, were on a safe in London. Before she unpacked herself, Valerie put them carefully in the top drawer of her new room. She locked them together, with the dearest presents she had from Timothy and the most precious things that marked their relationship. It's hard to believe that all the years they had together, her whole life now is locked in only one drawer.

On Monday, Valerie went to a hospital with an entire army. Her parents, Tessa, her grandparents, her aunts, uncles, cousins, they all wanted to come with her, to show her their support, and to hear what the doctor will say.

"Hello!" Valerie said when she entered the doctor's office alone.

"Ms. Patterson, I'm truly sorry to meet you under these circumstances. I'm Dr. John Richards."

The doctor introduced himself, and he began carefully to look at Valerie's scans. Dr. Richards was a very polite man in his late fifties. From Dr. Kwan's face, Valerie could see everything. But this new doctor, he was completely different. He showed no expression on his face.

"The sooner we start with the treatment, it will be better for you. I won't give you false hope. You are aware that you have a very serious disease. No one can be sure how the cancer will respond to the treatment, but the only thing I can promise you is that my team and I will give everything we can for you. Now we'll do more tests, and if the results are good, in three weeks, you'll have surgery. I'm sorry, I can't do it earlier. My schedule is full. And Ms. Patterson..."

"Please, call me Valerie."

"All right, Valerie, from the scans, I can see that the cancer is in the early stadium. We call it a stadium one, which is very good, but the surgery will tell us best. If you have any questions about the disease or the treatment, you can ask me."

Usually, the other patients have millions of questions, but Valerie didn't ask anything. She had other things on her mind. Does Timothy suffer as much as she suffers? What is he doing without her? Is he thinking of her without stopping, as she is thinking of him? These questions were not allowing her to focus on herself.

She wanted to live. She really did, for Timothy. She was afraid if she dies now, her worst nightmare would become true. Timothy will find out the truth, and he will stay alone his entire life. She wanted to live long enough to see him as an accomplished man, a successful writer, married to someone who will love him. Valerie knew nobody in this world could ever love him as much as she loves him, but she was hoping he would find someone who will love him enough. If she dies before that, she'll never find peace.

For some inexplicable reason, Valerie was always thinking negatively. For her, cancer always meant death. She forgot to think that she had a good chance of surviving the disease, and she could have a happy, long life, with Timothy.

When we love someone more than we love ourselves, sometimes we make wrong and irrational decisions. The matters of life and death are not in our hands. And matters of the heart, too. Our hearts don't have an on and off switch, and we can't control the love. We can't stop loving someone or fall in love with someone new when we want to. These things are not simple, and they are out of our control.